Continuing on tragedies of my life, here is one more
A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person we hired.
This is significant today because I finally took that step of my life I was so desperate to take. It was like a bone stuck in my throat, neither going in nor going out. I finally persuaded it to blow up but it the process also hurt myself. But it would be a permanent relief from the cacophony, my voice had turned into, both to me and my empathizers 
{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
IMeMy 09.25.06 at 2:20 pm
What an interesting parallel!
Taking a stand is always a relief. At least now you’re not pulled both ways!
Sharique 09.25.06 at 9:45 pm
Oh definitely is. At least i am can now rest in peace.
trip 09.25.06 at 10:08 pm
owww. sympathies Sharique. part of growin up. we’ve all gone through it. you will alright mate.
Sharique 09.25.06 at 10:16 pm
Trip,
Yup it is…you learn by making mistakes..btw nice to see your comment on a post like this
trip 09.26.06 at 6:03 am
Sharique 09.26.06 at 6:29 am
You are always welcome
u might have noticed that a LOT has happened in this blog that might be of interest to you 
trip 09.26.06 at 7:43 am
yes i read. so much has been said that there is nt much more to add.
however i felt that neoman (?) was being conveniently secular at times and conveniently defending SA as an Islamic country at other places. he also forgot that people go to SA to earn a living and serve that country, not to get discriminated against (that too in the most basic matters of religion). his faith in equality for all is obviously not a choice but rather it comes from no choice. this is the point people try to make when they quote the example of gulf countries. he took the bait, ended up saying you can’t force muslims to do anything (he’s not talking abt the right, but rather the might) in India and you can’t expect SA to give you rights as its an islamic country. i don’t know how this benefits his case. he’s feeling all man right now may be, but he did not win any friends.
Sharique 09.26.06 at 9:56 am
Hmm…kind of but those posts which incited him and me were equally condemnable. I think we had a discussion on this that if someone criticizes muslims then i have absolutely no problem with it but when islam is castigated then my passions run high. I wholeheartedly agree that no country today is following the islamic shariah today.
Just a thought, you know why people come up with rumours like “the man who created those cartoons has died in a fire” or “neil armstrong accepted islam when he saw mecca from moon”? Its because they need an impetus to satiate their degraded levels of adherence to islamic teachings. They need something to cheer about and excuses like these are readily accepted my general mass. (well something similar to idol drinking milk). And the only difference in our perspective is that you will blame ignorance and religion for such inane theories but i will put the blame on ignorance and being non-practising muslim
trip 09.27.06 at 1:20 am
I agree. but you see people find it difficult to differentiate between your faith and followers as its the nature of your faith. its a more or less complete politico - social - personal system with an emphasis on strict adhrerance (or actually all your leaders / gulf countries give the impression that strict adherance is important, and the visibility is high through the different dress code and hijab and street anger etc). so when you confront me on Vande Mataram and say that its not permitted under the same system, i’m also going to attribute other things done (may be under a wrong interpretation) under the same system to the system itself. you see interpretation and adherance is the responsibility of the faithful and not me. when i have to accept the interpretation for vande mataram, i will also accept the interpretation by Osama particularly when an Osama lookalike who calls himself Osama is used by Laloos and Paswans during elections to earn votes (meaning there is acceptance among followers too).
i’ll give you a parallel which will be easier to see with objectivity. the sati system is considered a great flaw in Hinduism. i agree it is so. i know there is no merit in it and infact a loss to Hinduism but I just can’t say those who practice it even today are not Hindu, or that its not part of Hindu tradition (the system started only 700 years ago, Hinduism (the eternal tradition) is atleast 3000 years old.). now i can just say that there’s nothing hindu abt it and look the other way, happy that i’m a good hindu, or fight it tooth and nail. its a choice. and this choice determines its the good interpretation of hinduism i follow or the bad. not just my words.
Sharique 09.27.06 at 10:38 am
Ah, i never expected this to start at least here
Well i don’t know how has your impression of islam or muslims changed after reading my blog posts but i have tried to criticize muslims in every way possible. I know few sympathize with osama but then majority don’t! BTW heard about his prostitute, Kola Boof?
From her autobiography
Lets imagine its true. So this will prove osama’s fans that he is no staunch muslim but a slave to humanly desires. I hope this turns out to be true and his popularity declines.
but then that’s the power i have so why shouldn’t i? and plus it doesn’t matter to be if the whole world is going against islam…i will be the same ardent and pious muslim. BTW i criticize muslims also a lot..those articles are in indianmuslims.in. The thing is people distort teaching of islam and use it for their desired purpose but then castigate those muslims not islam. But then the problem is a religion is judged by the society its followers create which is sadly pathetic as far as muslims are concerned!! you see that’s the whole problem. I can argue for life about islam being this and that but until and unless muslims show that to the world, nothing can impress other…that’s the tragedy of muslims. (oh now i have moved on from tragedy of mine to muslims 
)
I think you would have pained by the fact that i paint everything my by religious brush
there are infinite things which irk me and i do voice my opinion against them. I wonder why our strict adherence affects others? like hijab (BTW a girl in hijab looks beautiful than in a mini..don’t you feel so? and plus it definitely is not a symbol of backwardness)
trip 09.28.06 at 4:06 am
Hey thanks for the reply, but i did not want to start a new string here. i just wanted to explain why critics will not differentiate between faith and followers as its not their responsibility. i think all people are the same. when one is born, one is totally innocent. so when a substantial section of a community starts acting in a particular way in a collective manner, people will obviously blame what binds the community and not the followers alone. you see the followers were born innocent too, so critics think that there must be something ‘ideological’ that incites them to do so worldwide. i’m not saying you don’t defend your faith in the face of criticism, but you should do it smartly too, in such a way that you create trust and make friends. not how neoman did. you see we have seen so much anger and bravado, that we don’t have any more appetite for it.
i don’t mean to criticize hijab or even the beard and long shirts and the cap if its a matter of choice. all i’m saying is that it adds to the visibility, so when one stands out, one should be confident abt it and not complain that people are staring and judging. for example, i move around asia a bit and see lots of white people. they obviously stand out, but they are very confident and courteous and make friends. who likes an angry countenance?
i have no problems if you have a religious take on everything, but realize that you are also taking on additional responsibility of representing the religion and not just the power. so don’t blame people when they get confused while deciding whether its you or your religion they are talking abt.
Sharique 09.28.06 at 10:39 am
btw trip are you a girl?
You know what you behave like the girl i referred to in this post; i will talk about something and then she drops in with something not exactly related and then i have to change by persuasions again…again and again..i finally gave up! ah these girls..
Ok was kidding, now to your comment
I agree that being blunt doesn’t help but have i ever been? Noemaun said that in response to the post that incited that discussion, they were equally blunt so he no other option.
So you mean to say that muslims that you encounter are not friendly? I really can’t comment on that because you see i haven’t lived among muslims that much. I have lived outside home for academic reasons and there were only non-muslims around me. I find myself very comfortable in their company and they also find me amiable, i am damn sure. I hope your prejudice is not based on pakistanis? Personally i don’t like them..too arrogant and self-centered.
I try to justify my religion in every way i can. I get agitated when they unilaterally castigate Islam without sound logic, just for the sake of doing it.
trip 09.28.06 at 9:58 pm
Girl? a Girl? thats below the belt Sharique! literally
BTW that girl reference is a give away. you are still not over it. i think for that to happen somebody else has to supplant the girl in your fancy. so there is no timetable basically. the only good thing is that its empirically proven that we make it in the end
oh yes i’m not a very clear writer, i’m always in a hurry to put down whatever i can of my thoughts. but the fun part is, what others find to be different thoughts make perfect cohesive sense in my mind
so i think my relational thinking abilities are more advanced than my communication skills or i’m completely delusional. your pick 
i did not say muslims are not friendly. i’m saying we all should be. different things.
trip 09.28.06 at 9:59 pm
somehow all the smilies are gone from my post
trip 09.28.06 at 10:00 pm
ok they are back. i think i AM a woman.
Sharique 09.29.06 at 2:06 am
Oh, i am disappointed
I know that i am going to make it but you see its tough imagining now 
Everyone goes through this but they all finally end up with someone or the other 
they are weird, enigma and above all such a fickle!!
Really? you must have spent a lot of time with girls in your childhood then
pallavi 09.29.06 at 4:26 am
hi sharique hey as usal girls feel happy in doing that. your posts are really entertaing…
Sharique 09.29.06 at 6:22 am
Hi Pallavi,
I don’t say boys are always the sufferers. Anyway i plan to write a post on it. I am happy and thankful that you appreciate my posts. This reminds me something (don’t take it personally…dil pe mat lena 
)
Happy in doing that! what fun do they get out of playing emotions of innocent boys
she (the girl i referred to in the post) once claimed that she would be quite happy if she get someone like me to spend his life with. She was not at all serious and said so so to please me at that point of time. Thats what i hate in girl, they are always an enigma and never speak their heart out
pallavi 09.30.06 at 12:44 pm
you can never ans why girls… blah blah …. what girls… blahblah blah… if ever you will get answer of these question then for sure publish that on your blog your blog will become worlds best sellr… ha ha ha ha ha… hey im a gal and even i dont get some times that why we behave like this… ha ha ha ha ha but one thing not every girl is enigma and never speak heart out.. beware girls can be very straight frwd.. even more then a boy
pallavi 09.30.06 at 12:45 pm
and laugh laugh laugh alot.. life has too many surprises for you may be ones waiting some where:)
Sharique 09.30.06 at 10:18 pm
I know few girls can be straight forward and even few boys can be an enigma
‘what does a girl want?’ is the biggest question..hmm lets see if i can write on it..definitely not a best seller but perhaps few reader will acknowledge that 
I am desperately waiting for my surprise
aqsa 12.03.06 at 10:16 pm
good one!
jyoti 12.05.06 at 7:55 pm
hey Sharique. Watch “Kabhi Haan kabhi Naa” to get over that girl:)
And read “Why men don’t lsiten and women can’t read maps”. Will tell you lots of things about the female species:)
Sharique 12.05.06 at 8:37 pm
Hi Jyoti,
I am kind of over that girl..its been long since it happened. But i will read it for future references 
Thanks for those recommendations